Things I've learned through suffering

C.S. Lewis wrote about suffering in his book “The Problem of Pain” and I really “get” what he’s saying: “Pain insists upon being attended to. God whispers to us in our pleasures, speaks in our consciences, but shouts in our pains. It is his megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” So then, does suffering have a value? Absolutely not in the pain of it, but perhaps in what we make of experiencing the suffering, loss, persecution, sickness, death of a loved one, imprisonment – whatever it is. We find out because of it what we really believe for one thing – it’s either a faith‐breaker or a faith‐maker. We find out real quick what really matters. We find out who really loves us. Who we ourselves are as a person in‐and‐because‐of the pain and suffering. It’s probably the path for many that bring them to Christ and salvation. I’ve heard and quoted all my life a verse in Romans: “…all things work together for the good of those who love Him, and are called according to His purpose.” Now, on this side of some real suffering I’d say ‐ Really?? All things? Wow, that’s kind of a hard one to wrap my head around ‐‐ so I don’t try. I wrap my heart around it. I cling to it for my very life. For the life of my child. So, in answer to my own questions and the questions of many, “Why do bad things happen to good people? Why is their suffering? I guess the only answer is that Jesus came not to make a way out but to make a way through. Scripture talks about the refinement process of gold and silver. That refinement happens in a very hot (painful) fire. So then, God allows us to go through hard times so we will grow and become a reflection of Him, and in that, others can see Him in us.

So how am I making it through the pain and suffering? The Bible says that the strength to live tomorrow will be given tomorrow, not today. But – it WILL be given. So then, my focus today is not to have the strength needed for tomorrow's troubles. Today I just have to live by the mercies given for today, and to believe that there will be brand new mercies waiting for me when I wake up tomorrow. That means today's mercies don’t include the strength for tomorrow. What they do include is the faith that tomorrow's unseen mercies will suffice for tomorrow. None of us likes it when our faith and strength gauge reads "empty" at the end of the day, and we have to go to sleep – if we even can – not feeling the power we know we’re going to need for tomorrow's troubles. Matthew 6:34 says "Don’t be anxious for tomorrow; for tomorrow will care for itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own." I’ve said so many times in our present suffering, “I’m depleted ‐ overwhelmed! One more straw and this camel's back is going to break!” And then I get depressed and anxious that the troubles of tomorrow are going to be piled in on top of today’s depleted condition. And at the very moment when that “one more straw” gets added – I have found that God is there with the new mercy I need. Sometimes I’m not really even cognizant of it at the time, but only in looking back and reflecting on it I recognize His mercy. I don’t take as much for granted anymore.

But in spite of all the peace I feel in any particular moment, or even look back and reflect on – there is still this battle that goes on. I don’t want to wait for tomorrow! I want to know the future – to know and experience the adequacy today for tomorrow’s “straws.” But it doesn’t work that way. He said, “I’ll give it to you when you need it.” So people say, and I’ve said myself upon hearing about some hardship someone else experienced and endured faithfully and with some inner reserve of strength, “Oh my gosh, how can you trust God? I just couldn’t handle that! It would be too much!” That’s because they aren’t experiencing those “new mercies and the strength” God is bestowing on the person who is walking “through the fire”. It may look impossible to us but God is in to the impossible. So I would encourage you not to hide your pain and suffering from the brothers and sisters Jesus has put into your lives and sometimes even unbelievers He puts into your life. You know what a Christ‐skeptic can’t argue with, can’t rationalize away, can’t intellectualize and pontificate upon until faith looks like Pablum for the simple‐minded – YOUR PERSONAL STORY – YOUR TESTIMONY! As the popular saying goes – “It is what it is!” Don’t try and act on the outside like your life is perfect and you have no troubles. We all have troubles. If you don’t now, you will later. It’s guaranteed; “In this world you will have trouble; BUT, rejoice and be exceedingly glad for I have overcome this world.” That “I” sure isn’t me – it’s Jesus Christ, the Son of God. It is in the sharing of those troubles that we build each other up in the most holy faith. It is in holding each other up that we ourselves are held up. “Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” We may be the “mercy” that God is provisioning someone with for that day that helps them stand and endure. Many have been that for me and my family. I hope to be that to others.

Back in the early 1980’s we lived in Texas and went to a awesome Spirit-led United Methodist Church. There was a little chorus we sang there. It’s actually just a verse out of Lamentations 3. “The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases. His mercies never come to an end. They are new every morning; new every morning. Great is Thy faithfulness oh Lord. Great is Thy faithfulness.”

Great little praise ditty. Problem is it skips over the “lament” of Jeremiah which is gut‐wrenching and painfully raw. Here it is – the place of pain and suffering:

I am the one who has seen the afflictions
that come from the rod of the Lord’s anger.
He has led me into darkness,
shutting out all light.
He has turned his hand against me
again and again, all day long.

He has made my skin and flesh grow old.
He has broken my bones.
He has besieged and surrounded me
with anguish and distress.
He has buried me in a dark place,
like those long dead.

He has walled me in, and I cannot escape.
He has bound me in heavy chains.
And though I cry and shout,
he has shut out my prayers.
He has blocked my way with a high stone wall;
he has made my road crooked.

He has hidden like a bear or a lion,
waiting to attack me.
He has dragged me off the path and torn me in pieces,
leaving me helpless and devastated.
He has drawn his bow
and made me the target for his arrows.

He shot his arrows
deep into my heart.
My own people laugh at me.
All day long they sing their mocking songs.
He has filled me with bitterness
and given me a bitter cup of sorrow to drink.

He has made me chew on gravel.
He has rolled me in the dust.
Peace has been stripped away,
and I have forgotten what prosperity is.
I cry out, “My splendor is gone!
Everything I had hoped for from the Lord is lost!”

The thought of my suffering and homelessness
is bitter beyond words.
I will never forget this awful time,
as I grieve over my loss.
Yet I still dare to hope
when I remember this

[And it’s here, at this moment, where, mysteriously and inexplicably, Jeremiah’s song of praise breaks out.]

The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases.
His mercies never come to an end.
They are new every morning.
Great is your faithfulness.
The Lord is my portion says my soul.
Therefore I will hope in Him.


We kind of like the little feel‐good praise ditty that skips over the dark, raw, painful suffering – the laments in our lives – right to the feel‐good part. But what I’ve learned is – there is a suffering part. There’s a part where you are dragged off the path and left torn and bleeding. Where you feel like you are a bull’s eye target with arrows planted deep into your heart. You may feel like you are unfairly being used for target practice – WHY ME?! You need God’s grace but it’s the kind of grace that Dietrich Bonhoeffer differentiated between in The Cost of Discipleship, “cheap grace and costly grace.” Grace is not cheap. It is the “treasure hidden in the field,” “the pearl of great price,” “it’s the grace that calls a man to leave his nets and follow Christ,” “it’s the door at which we knock and keep knocking,” – it costs everything. It cost a man His life.

Lamentations 3 also talks about God’s compassion [v.32]. “But though he cause grief, yet will he have compassion according to the multitude of his mercies.” I looked up the root for that word – compassion – which is rakham. It means womb. It’s used many places in the Bible – both Old and New Testament. It means that God has the heart of a mother. Now that’s something I totally understand! Is there anything stronger than a mom’s love and need to protect and fight for her child? Moms don’t give up on their kids – that’s how they are hardwired. [Note: I want to make clear I’m not excluding fathers and their incredible love for their children – but I’m just staying with the theme of the “womb”.] I know for me it would be an impossibility to consider giving up on my sons. And God doesn’t give up on us – we are his kids. The safest place for a child to be is when they are still inside their mother’s womb where they are protected and shielded from harm.

The Hebrew word for mercy is chesed. It means God’s loyal love connected to his covenant relationship with us which encompasses his promises to love and care for us. That love and care IS NOT based on emotions, circumstances, or (thank God!) my performance. It is UNCONDITIONAL AND CONSISTENT. A mother’s love is unconditional and consistent. So the womb is a biological example of God's tender and loving mercy. That is a beautiful picture. Isaiah 49:15 says, “Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Even though she may forget, I will not forget you!” God’s love is tenacious. It’s self-sacrificing. It’s life‐giving and nourishing. It’s fierce. So the compassion and mercy that God has for us is the kind of love and compassion Jesus calls us to live out as reflections [refined] of Him. Luke 6:36 says “Be compassionate as God is compassionate.” It’s a core value of any Christian’s walk on this earth, and because of my suffering, one I am learning and trying to live as best I can. So now when that “one more straw” gets added to your ever‐growing pile – LOOK UP AND KEEP ON GOING!